Finally, what you’ve been waiting for. No, not Christmas- that happened already! What? New Years Eve? Who’s that? What you were really looking forward to is The Top 20 best Horror Films of the Decade! We made it, guys. We fuckin’ made it.

For the last time, The Plan:

#20-#1 Best Horror Films of the Decade

According to this list

(bolded = watched this week, * = favorite)

• Suspiria (2018)
• Coherence (2013)
• Green Room (2015)
• Tigers Are Not Afraid (2017)
• Us (2019)*
• A Quiet Place (2018)
• The Killing of a Sacred Deer (2017)
• Train to Busan (2016)
• The Witch (2015)
• Midsommar (2019)*
• The Skin I Live In (2001)
• Take Shelter (2011)
• The Wailing (2016)
• I Saw the Devil (2010)
• Hereditary (2018)*
• One Cut of the Dead (2017)
• Black Swan (2010)
• What We Do in the Shadows (2014)
• Get Out (2017)*
• The Lighthouse (2019)

Now, now. I know what you’re thinking. “Sydney, how the hell have you never seen What We do in the Shadows? What’s wrong with you!“. Here’s the thing: I genuinely thought I had seen it. Years and years ago, I watched a mockumentary about a coven of vampires. When everyone started talking about What We Do in the Shadows, I thought for sure it was the same movie. Turns out, there are TWO mocumentary-style movies about vampire covens just trying to coexist in the modern age, and I had watched the other one, called Vampires (2010). By the time I figured that out, everyone was so busy criticizing people who hadn’t see WWDitS, that I just kept up the ruse.

This week, for the finale, I righted that wrong.

Unofficial Musings

I need to level with you. I’m so done with this countdown. A lot of the movies I’ve watched in the last three weeks have been decent- some even good!- but almost none of them have been scary, and few felt like true horror movies. I love thrillers, I love horror-comedies. But I can only take so much of “man-avenges-his-dead-girlfried/fiance/wife-by-tracking-down-the-men-who-killed-her”. It’s not interested. It’s not creative. It’s not scary. It’s just disappointing. They’re rarely even gruesome (I Saw the Devil (2010) being the rare exception in terms of gore. But even then, there’s so little plot that I could literally walk away from the movie for an hour and not miss anything.

There were a couple movies on this weeks to do list that I was genuinely excited to finally be forced to watch. The Skin I Live In (2011) is by one of my favorite directors of all time- Pedro Almodóvar- and is one I’d been putting off because everyne who had seen it kept telling me how gruseome and visceral it is, and (SPOILER!) since I knew the movie featured a vaginoplasty, I figured the only way for it to be that horrifying is if they showed the operation on screen. Nope. (END SPOILER!) I should’ve known better when it was only men talking about how gory the film was, and never women. Really, they were just telling on themselves by saying that the most gruesome thing they can imagine is being turned into a woman. Go fucking figure.

I’d also been meaning to watch the Suspiria (2018) remake, as well as Train to Busan (2016) so I’m happy to finally be able to check those off my list.

Before going into this, I had never heard of One Cut of the Dead (2017) and now I can’t imagine how it never crossed my path. The first 37 minutes of the movie is a. Single. Take. You heard me right. No cuts. One camera. One take. Then, the last hour of the movie is a narrative story (still fiction) of how the cast and crew came together to create this “episode” for a new “Zombie Channel” on television. It’s Meta as hell, and I 100% thoroughly and completely enjoyed it. It’s not at all scary, and not really gory, so even if you aren’t a horror nerd OR a film nerd, I highly recommend checking it out.

Now, the sad news. As you might know, the “highest rated” “horror” “movie” of the decade was the recently released movie titled The Lighthouse (2019). Part of the reason I had decided to make this a three week countdown was because iTunes said the movie wouldn’t be available online until late December. I was fine with biding my time. Until, that is, I learned that iTunes meant it wouldn’t be available to PURCHASE until late December. I don’t particularly feel like paying $15 to own a movie that I have a pretty good feeling I’m not going to enjoy, but I won’t be able to rent it for another couple weeks, so unfortunately The Lighthouse (2019) needs to be officially disqualified.

In the End

While I’m more excited to be able to have freedom in the things I watch again, I do think this countdown was a good exercise for me. I feel more confident in claiming my expertise in modern horror, and this is easily the most (new) films I have ever watched in a three week span, which is impressive to no one except myself.

I am a little disappointed I wasn’t able to watch two of the films (out of the 35 that were new to me at the start of this countdown). Kotoko (201_) and The Lighthouse (2019) eluded me, and while I don’t know if I will ever be able to watch Kotoko (since it’s not a new movie and was impossible to find anywhere with US clearances), I will probably someday get to The Lighthouse. I know I’m probably going to be bored, but it’s gay. And I’m a sucker for gay narratives, regardless of how good they are.

Also, after making it through this list, I feel pretty confident that I can make a better one, based solely on my opinions of horror films (and, unlike Letterboxd, mine will actually be scary). So stay tuned for that one!

~ If you’re curious about one of the movies I didn’t talk about (or if you’re interested in one of the movies I’d already seen before, reach out to me! Just because I didn’t write about it doesn’t mean I don’t have thoughts about it ~