Sorry if you feel the title was a ruse, but this will probably not be a short post.
I know! I know. But coming up with witty titles that summarize a full week’s worth of viewing *and* are factually accurate is actually a much larger feat than one may realize. So, I’m taking artistic liberty. Because I watched a lot of shorts this week.
But first, a non short. I have, in fact, watched Alice in Wonderland (1951) before; I must have, because I was a child and Alice in Wonderland is a classic. Except when I went to watch it this week, I’d realized I had absolutely zero memory of it. Absolutely nothing. The flower chorus? Nope. Alice being put on trial? Nuh uh. The walrus story? Excuse me?
So I really got the feeling of watching it for the first time, which was novel. And don’t kill me, but I wasn’t a fan. It was fun chaos, it was stressful chaos. I have enough anxiety on my own without a white rabbit running across screen screaming at his giant pocket watch about the time, thankyouverymuch. Plus, everyone in Wonderland is so bratty and mean so no reason! I’d rather be transported to Oz, Wicked Witch and all. Hell, I’d even rather be in Return to Oz era Oz.
So after that hallucinogenic journey, I went ahead a took a crack at some of the Disney shorts I keep adding to my watch-list blindly. I’m such a sucker for the cheap feel of accomplishment that comes with finishing a film, and I get practically the same feeling when I finish a short, so it’s a nice way to trick myself into feeling successful when I’m feeling down on myself (which I really, really was on Wednesday #internstruggles). First up was Mike’s New Car (2002), about Mike, well, getting a new car. It’s a Monsters Inc. spin-off, that features Mike and Sully struggling to work a super “high tech” car, and hilarity ensues. I mean, maybe not total hilarity, but I did get a couple chuckles. So, of course, I had to watch Party Central (2013). Instead of being a Monsters Inc. short, this one is a Monsters University short, so ya know, diversity. Party Central takes place when Mike and Sully were in college and their fraternity was throwing a boring party. So the guys decide to steal someone else’s party. I liked this one more, mainly because I liked Monsters University more.
I finished off my little foray into small Disney features with an old and mostly forgotten one: Babes in the Woods (1932). No, it’s not porn (though I would think so too, based on the title). This one is a Hansel and Gretel-esque story, where two young children (the ‘babes’) play with some elves before being whisked away by a witch to her house made of candy. Instead of cooking them, however, this witch likes to turn children into spiders (and bats and cats and rats). Unlike the other shorts, this one had the honor of receiving Disney’s “This program is presented as originally created. It may contain outdated cultural depictions” disclaimer, likely due to the classically antisemitic character design of the witch.
After that situation, I was cleaning up my Letterboxd watch-list (fun fact: I have 8 separate watch-lists), and rediscovered a short film called He Took His Skin Off For Me (2014). Pretty intriguing title, right? I found the full short film on YouTube, so I decided to give it a go. Other than being really difficult to watch at times (something about someone literally tearing off their skin unnerves me- go figure), it was pretty interesting. The makeup effects done on the skinless were really impressive. Apparently, it’s based on a short story, and now I’m curious to check that out, to see how faithful of an adaption this was.
My laptop charger was broken for three days, which drastically limited my ability to watch new things (yes, my tv has streaming channels on it, but this is my excuse and I’m sticking to it). Sunday was a fun day: some friends came over (Hi Friends!) and we finished American Horror Story: Apocalypse. AKA American Horror Story: Flashbacks. There were so many time jumps in this season that it was nearly impossible to keep track of the timeline on first viewing. But by God, this is one of the most fun shows to watch with people, because it’s so impossible to take seriously. Nothing is fact checked, the dialogue struggles, and the plot lines are either dropped completely or driven to bizarre. I love it. We followed that up with an unofficial singalong version of Hairspray (2007) before calling it a night.
Unofficial Ratings
Alice in Wonderland
I appreciate this for the sheer fact that Disney didn’t pull any punches on this one.
Mike’s New Car
Maybe this is what gave me a fear of driving as a kid?
Party Central
This was the most ingenious use of those portal doors ever and it’s a shame this concept isn’t further realized in the Monster’s universe.
Babes in the Woods
Every time I searched this title in order to double check what year it was released, I was always a little worried my manager would think I was looking up something XXX while working the front register.
He Took His Skin Off for me
Sometimes, when your significant other asks you to do something, it’s okay to say no. This is probably one of those times. Side note: how much blood does his body produce? He’s always leaving hand prints and shit so clearly his skinless body never dried. But he also never runs out of blood. I know this is meant to be ~metaphorical~ and not at all literal, but still, I have questions.
Hairspray
One of the best parts was the fact that sometimes we would actually sing the regular speaking dialogue in the movie, because there’s a lot of normal talking in the middle of songs and our brains couldn’t process the quick changes fast enough.
American Horror Story: Apocalypse
90% of the plot occurs in the last 20 minutes of the season, which was a lot of fun to try to explain to someone coming in blind to the entire series without sounding completely psychotic.
Film Student Watchlist 